The Chaos Lately

As soon as I wake each morning, all I can think about is going to bed that night. After a cup of coffee the number of waking hours that I face seem more possible. Despite the constant fatigue caused by a chronic condition called parenthood, I still love being home with my babies. It is chaos but really fun chaos. I wanted to update many those of you who have been asking about the chaos.

House Chaos: 

Our house is about 90% finished. We still have boxes to unpack, pictures to hang and odds and ends to tidy up. My favorite rooms in the house are the kitchen and family room. Ironically, those are the rooms  where I spend most of our time. Let me show you some before and after pictures of three rooms. 

Family Room

This room is my absolute favorite. We bought a new sectional that is pretty much my favorite piece of furniture beside my bed. I love this room so much. It makes me almost forgot the insanely bad smell. Thankful the smell is gone and the prettiness remains. 

Master Bathroom

This room is small and we are still working out the kinks but it is completely functional and doesn't have that weird exterior entrance so win/win.

Master Bedroom

I finally put up all of the boxes and our room feels much bigger. I have a confession. I had to take pictures of our home for our dossier and home study. These are the only 3 rooms that looked good enough to photograph.  Maybe I will get the other rooms in shape sometime in the next three months.


Seth Chaos:

Many of you have been asking about Seth lately and I really appreciate that. Seth has had a really rough six months. Last Friday was procedure number 4 and it hasn't really gotten any easier on him. We really didn't know what would happen when they went in to surgery. Seth has been very sensitive to light for a couple of months. The cause of this sensitivity was caused by the glaucoma tube being too long. It  was rubbing a hazy spot onto his cornea. They removed the tube, trimmed it and put it back into place. The good news is his pressure was still good so that meant the tube was still doing its job. Hopefully we will finally get to put the contact in this week and begin the patching within the next two weeks. I really feel like the hard stuff is behind us. The path forward will definitely have bumps but Seth will learn to get used to the new normal. I'm not sure if this is the last surgery but I suspect its probably not. His eye will continue to change and grow and the tube is a fixed objected that will have to be adjusted.
He has been through a lot but he is doing ok.


Lila Chaos:

This is some good, happy chaos. We had our first home study visit and it went great. We have our second and third in the next couple weeks. We have to have a total of four so it is really starting to roll. The home study is the biggest piece to our dossier. The good thing about the home study is that a lot of our paperwork overlaps with the dossier. Jon and I are waiting on Pre-approval from China. Pre-approval is basically China telling us they will put her file on hold for a certain period time for us to finish our dossier. We have two hold ups with that process right now. Our agency doesn't have her 'official file' yet they only have her pre-file. My agency is only one who will have access to her file so we really don't have a fear of losing her. The second snag is right now China is celebrating Chinese New Year. Their celebrations are not a one or two day event. They shut the country down for a full week. So PA will not come until after CNY is over. It really is a big deal. It will be fun to celebrate next year with her. We are still selling our puzzle pieces and you guys have bought 183 and counting. That is mind blowing. If you still would like to purchase pieces there is a donate button at the top right of this page. I think about her constantly. We talk about her constantly. The boys have started praying for her at meals (be still my heart) and Zoey wants to buy her all the cute clothes. We are beyond excited to have her in our family.

That's all the chaos at this moment. Love to you all.

Loving Lila

I can not begin to express the overwhelming gratitude I have for the outpouring of love and support for our decision to bring Lila into our family. I mean really overwhelmed and so excited at the same time. We know that God is writing this story and we are excited to share with you as we go. We have had many people asking a lot of questions about Lila and this process and I want to answer a few of the most common but before I do I want to reiterate a very important point. Jon and I are not within any stretch of the imagination, perfect parents. Nor will we ever be. We are simply walking the path we feel God has called us to. If at any point any of you are seriously considering international adoption I would love to talk to you. I have found some of the kindest and most supportive people to be adoptive parents. We are still learning daily about this process but we are passionate about these children. Now to the questions: I am going to answer the three most common questions we have gotten so far.


1. What do you know about Lila?

We know a lot and not much at the same time. Lila is about 17 months old and she has been living with a foster mom since April of 2016. She was abandoned as a baby outside of a hospital. Lila's special needs are physical and not cognitive. She has a difference in the size of her limbs (one sides' limbs are shorter than the other). She can walk and say a few words. We do have pictures and videos of her but we are not allowed to make those public until much later in the process. She is precious and her face is what motivates me to move as quickly as possible.


2. When can you bring her home?

I wish I could tell you a timeframe but we really have no idea. Chinese adoptions tend to be quicker and more efficient than other international adoptions. However it can range anywhere from 6-18 months depending on the route you take. You have two options: 1. Find your child first and then do all the paperwork and waiting. 2. Do the paperwork first and then be matched with your child. We went with the first route. It wasn't the way we intended to go but here we are. The hardest part about our route is knowing she is there waiting for us and we are missing months of her life. I have a timeframe in my mind but a lot of it depends on situations beyond my control (i.e. governments).  Below is a diagram that show the steps we will have to take. We are in the home study part. So you see we really are right at the beginning.

3. What can we do to help?

The most important way all of you can be a part of this process is to pray. Pray for Lila. Pray for us. Pray for government officials. Pray for Lila's foster mom. Pray. Pray. We also need your help with funding. International adoption is not cheap. It ranges anywhere from $25,000-$35,000 due to many variables. Jon and I have been able to fund the first major steps but we will be unable to apply for grants until after our home study is complete. We have decided to appeal to our friends and family to play a major role in bringing Lila home. So many of you will play a huge role in Lila's life just has you loved on Zoey, Seth and Thad. We are fully trusting that God will provide ways for us to gain the necessary funds but we are asking for you be a part as well. Our first fundraiser is not an original idea but is one that I love so much because it allows almost everyone to be involved. I have purchased a 500 piece personalized puzzle with this image.

Each piece of the puzzle will be worth $10. We will write the name of the person who donates on the back of each puzzle piece. If you give $50 you get 5 pieces. Once the puzzle is complete we will put it in a two sided glass frame and hang it in our home. Once Lila is old enough to hear her story we can show her the names of everyone who help bring her home. She will know she is loved simply by the names and those names will become a part of her story. I have put a donate button right over here.---->
We will be doing other fundraisers and projects but this is one that even my kids can be a part of!

Thanks for reading!! We love you all and yet again so grateful for your support!

The Unintentional Christmas Gift

The holidays have come and gone and I am ashamed to admit I was somewhat of a Grinch this year. I slacked on the gift buying. I wasn't overly excited to put up the tree. Bah-hum bug. I'm going to blame it on the craziness of the past six months. Yep, that's the culprit. Life. It sucked the Christmas spirit right out of me. However, the closer to Christmas it got the more I could feel that holly jolly spirit creeping into my bones. I adore family time and Christmas gives me the unavoidable opportunity to spend some time with my favorite people on the planet. The spirit culminated on Christmas morning. I love my kids' contagious joy over bandaids in their stockings. It really is magical but this Christmas Jon and I were gifted a blessing that was the result of months of prayer, research, prayer, endless discussions and did I say prayer? It was an idea that was planted by others and watered by friends who told us of its blessings.

Jon and I have decided to adopt a beautiful baby girl from China. She is a precious child whose story we are just beginning to learn. For now we will just call her Lila.  She was our unintentional Christmas gift. This Christmas as I sat and watched my children open dozens of gifts from people who love and adore them I also saw Lila and the faces of dozens of children whom I have read about. Children, who through no fault of their own, would not sit around experiencing that same love and adoration. Children who don't have a mom or dad to rock them to sleep at night or kiss their boo boos. You see, when you start researching international adoption or domestic adoption you quickly realize most of these kids would trade ALL of the gifts for family movie nights or t-ball teams or someone to sit down a read them a book. The research will get you. It will pull at heart strings you didn't know you had. It will make you look at your teenager in a whole new light because when a child turns 14 in China they age out of the foster care system. Forever.  Fourteen. To fend for themselves. I found this quote from a 30 year old Chinese orphan who aged out of the foster care/orphanage system. This quote sucker punched me and forced Jon and I to stop researching, discussing and start moving.

"When I grew up in the orphanage it was Christians who bought us beds, clothing and provided money monthly for food. It was a Christian who wrote a letter in a shoebox, who first told me I was loved. It was the Christians who met all my physical and material needs in that orphanage. But it was also Christians who neglected my biggest need. Children in orphanages don't need more money, nicer building or better clothes. I am not an orphan because I lost my home or provisions. I am an orphan because I lost my parents. I needed a mom and a dad. I needed a family. Christians treated all my temporary symptoms of need but never cured my long term disease of being an orphan. I am still an orphan."

Before you begin forming these mythical notions that we must be these amazing parents allow me to dispel those notions like footprints in the sand. We are imperfect people serving a perfect God. A God who gives and takes away. Although Lila has lost her biological parents we are praying daily that God allows us to be the parents who can give her exactly what she needs to not only grow physically and emotionally but to also develop a relationship with her heavenly Father.

What I ask from you is simple…..pray…pray….and pray. Pray for us as we navigate this process with unlimited paperwork. Pray for our family as we are striving each day to be better. Pray for Lila as she is about to undergo some major changes in her young life. Pray for funding. We know God will provide. Pray…pray…pray.


Love you all. I'm sure you will hear more about this soon.